Ask Maxy

Dear Maxy,

I am so frustrated . I have been working with a young man for several months now,and while he has a huge heart, he is extremely limited when it comes to basic skills . He came to me as an intern, and now I pay him a small salary . I have also been working with him, trying to teach him grammer  and sentence structure , I have also been working to help him create checklists so that he completes his tasks in a timely manner.

I believe that he must have developmental disabilities . I cannot understand  what other reason there could be for his inability to process  basic tasks. I want him to succeed . But he makes so many mistakes, I don't know if I can continue  employing him  > How should I  handle this ?

Amelia

Dear Amelia ,

It is wonderful that you have taken this man under your wing  and that you are working so hard to help him develop his skills . I hope that you are also constantly talking to him in an uplifting way about  areas where he can focus more of his attention so that he can succeed. That said , you also must pay attention to your bottom line. If the mistakes he makes are actually hurting your business , you should  first look to see if he can fulfill a different function that doesn't  require the skills he has yet to master. If you are unable to to place him in a role that matches  your needs and his skill set , you may not be able to  keep him in your employ .

When the day comes that you have to let him go , be sure that you have armed him with as much support as you possibly can . You may also want to talk to him about his future goals and do your best to help him find a job that will help him reach his next level of success.

Maxy

Dear Maxy,

The other day , one of my old friends stopped by my house uninvited and when he came in , my house wasn't tidy . I didn't want to let him in because my home wasn't ready for company . But  he's my friend  so I let him in . He starting dissing me really bad , calling me a slob and stuff . I didn't appreciate that . Now he's blabbing to everyone who will listen to him about my place . What can I do ?

Mike

Dear Mike ,

Let's deal with first things first . If you clean your house , you won't be vulnerable to anyone talking about how messy it is . Make that your primary focus . But also contact your  "friend" and tell him you don't appreciate him talking about your home . Remind him that friends support each other . They don't stab each other in the back .

Maxy

Dear Maxy,

I associate with some older gentlemen through my church . Many of them have nose hairs and eyebrows so long you could comb them . Why aren't their wives telling them  to take care of this ? It is repulsive for those of us to look up at them  while conversing . Ladies , please be helpmates to your husbands.

Cathy

Dear Cathy ,

We have to assume these men do not realize they have hairs hanging from unattractve places, and it's possible no one around them is willing to bring up the issue . And at some point, the eyesight can weaken, and these hairs are not noticed . I urge people to take care of their personal grooming since it makes an impression, justified or not, and if you need a magnification mirror, get one.

Maxy