Ask Maxy

Dear Maxy ,
I am supposed to speak at my graduation  and don't know where to start . I have written down a speech with various ideas, but I am nervous  about them being in a jumble  and about my speech not having an impact . I am not worried about messing up because people will forget about it in a few weeks  ---but I am not sure I want people to forget about the speech! I want it to have an important enough impact for them to remember  it , but I am not particularly philosophical or profound . I also want it to be light enough for people to laugh . Where do I start ?
Stage Fright
Dear Stage Fright,
Think about the big message  you want to share  with your class . What stands out for you as emblematic of the class ? What are your class strengths ? Do your best to remember funny stories  and moving moments  that you can use to reflect on your time together . Write an outline  for your speech  just as you used to do in English class . Build out your thoughts in an organized manner . Sprinkle in humor throughout while maintaining the tenor  of the core theme . As you write your speech , stick to your outline . Then read it out loud a few times  to see if it works as a spoken piece . Ask someone you trust to listen to you to help you edit  and refine .
Maxy

Dear Maxy ,
My wife and I received many gift cards to restaurants as wedding presents last year . We haven't used them because  we are concerned about etiquette.
When we use one of the cards, do we need to invite  the person that gave it to us to join us at the restaurant ? If so, do we need to cover the cost of their meal ? We don't want to be rude .
Newlyweds
Dear Newlyweds ,
You would not invite  the gift-giver  to join you everytime  you use  a place setting or your new mixer, would you ? The gift cards are the same  . We do recommend , however, that you check to be certain the cards haven't expired .
Maxy

Dear Maxy,
I live in New York City  and I am sure you know that rent is crazy expensive; Therefore , I have a roommate to help out . She was a friend of mine  prior to becoming my roommate . It seems that living with her is a lot more difficult  than just being friends . She is always trying to outdo everything I do as if there is some competition . If I say  that I want a certain bag  or if I am dating a great guy, she always try to one-up me. I don't know how to address the issue  without sounding harsh  or mean .
Mocked
Dear Mocked ,
It is heart-to-heart time. Sit down with your roommate  and tell her  you want to talk  about something  that makes you feel uncomfortable . Point out  that now that you live together  you have  noticed  that she likes  to copy everything you do . Give her examples, such as the bag  or even the date . Suggest  to her that if your relationship is going to work, you both need your space . That includes space to express your individuality without  feeling that your roommate is going  to steal  your style or your friends .
Maxy