Ask Maxy

Dear Maxy ,
My neighborhood is very friendly . We greet one another  when outside, help one another  and are very cordial .
However , there is one family who isn't as kind and friendly . The overall view of that particular family is one of pure disdain . When they come outside, they do not greet anyone. In fact , one of the residents  there cursed out  an elderly woman on the block .
In preparation for  the hurricane, everyone did their  part the night before  to clear the streets  of leaves and debris , except them . That family lives closest to the storm drain  at their end of the block . If they didn't clean  their area, there was a good chance  the leaves in their area  would clog  the drain  and cause flooding on the block .
How do you deal  with neighbors  who are inconsiderate  and rude ?
Fed up

Dear Fed Up ,
Now that the hurricane has passsed, I hope you and your neighbors  were able to work with this family  to clear the drains . Without question, in an emergency, even if your neighbors have had bad manners, your community needs to come together to insist that safety precautions be followed .
When you approach a contentious  neighbor as a united front  while remaining friendly, you stand a better chance  of being heard  and heeded . Beyond that, you can continue to reach out  to these neighbors, letting  them know that you want  them to be part  of the community and doing your best to win them over  with your welcoming nature .
Maxy

Dear Maxy ,
My aunt told me  there is something going on in our extended family  that will affect everyone . She says  that it has to do with  one particular family and that the news will come out  in the next few months . She left me with a cliffhanger.
I know it's not my right to ask questions, but I'm going insane  thinking of every possible  situation (death , cancer , divorce , ets). How can I make peace  with this situation ?
Worried Niece

Dear worried Niece,
I wonder why your aunt chose to give you such a cryptic message ? I understand  that some people  feel that they have premonitions  base on knowledge they think they have  . But this presumed knowledge is often just that ... presumed .
On the other hand, your aunt  may legitimately  know some news  that has yet to surface . If so, it was wrong  of her to tease you with  such an ominous prediction . Go to your aunt  and ask her what she was talking  about . Tell her that you have been worried  since your last  conversation . Ask her if you  should be concerned  about a family member's health, safety or well being . If she doesn't want to share her suspicious  with you, she may want to speak to one of your parents .
If your aunt  will not budge, tell one of  your parents  and ask for their guidance .
Maxy

Dear Maxy ,
I am a transgendered boy  and having trouble  coming out to my family . I wear sport bras  and boy's clothing most of the time , and when I am speaking with my friends, I use male pronouns, but can't gather the courage to tell my family .
My mother and I once talked  about it briefly, but I got nervous  and ended up saying  it was no big deal . Now I feel  as if I missed  my chance  and will have to wait  a long time before  I get another shot  at it . Being referred  to and apppearing  as a girl  makes me uncomfortable, but I know nothing is going to change  until I tell them .
Nervous
 
Dear Nervous ,
Your mother likely suspects what is going on  and is simply waiting  for you to bring  up the subject  again . . While you're considering  that please contact PFLAG ( pflag.org), an organization  that can answer  your questions  and help you discuss the matter with your parents .
Maxy