Ask Maxy

Dear Maxy ,
Recently , my husband  mentioned that he  wanted to get together with some friends  for a project . I encouraged him to invite  the guys  to our home  to work  on it . I thought it would be a few hours  , but it ended up taking well over  12 . They arrived  early in the morning  and stayed late that night , taking over our living room .
I suggested  in private  to my husband  that he should  have wrapped things up  by late afternoon . The project  is for fun . It's not like they had a dealine  for work . It is also designed  to continue  on a weekly basis for the next six months  , so committing to only a portion of the day  would have made much difference .
My husband , however is a people pleaser  and didn't feel he could  ask his freels  to leave before  they wanted to . Would it be wise  to discuss a lax but scheduled time  of arrival and departure with them in the future  , or am I being unfair  to suggest that the party should move  else-where  after 10 hours ? I want my husband  and his friends  to feel comfortable  in our home  , but I also  don't want my house invaded  for such a long period of time .
Wondering
Dear Wondering ,
It is always wise to discuss  time constraints in advance , particularly when overstaying annoys you so much . Some wives  would have no objection to a 13-hour marathon . They would occupy themselves elsewhere  , and this is one option for you . But please discuss reasonable limits with your husband  , allowing yourself  to be the "bad guy" in order  for him  to ask his friends  to leave when you're had enough  . There is no point  creating  ill will with one's spouse if it could easily be avoided .
Maxy

Dear Maxy ,
My friend just lost her job  , and she is so upset  that she says she wants to go back to the job and kill her boss . I'm serious . She is fuming mad  and can't seem to control her anger . I have beed suggesting  that she blow off steam  in other ways  , including during the basics like applying  for unemployment insurance  and even filing  a claim against him if she thinks she was wrongly fired . I'm concerned , though . Should I tell the police  if she says she's heading down there  to hurt him ? I don't really want to get involved .
Concerned
Dear Concerned .
I know it's hard  yo imagine telling on your friend  , but if you believe someone is about to commit a crime , you are obligated  to speak up . You could do that by alerting security  at your friend's workplace . You also could call the police and give them the information  you have  , then step back .
Maxy

Dear Maxy ,
I'm planning our upcoming high school reunion  for the class of 1962 . There are a few people  who have never attended any of our reunions .
I know my classmates  didn't have  the same high school experience I did . But for the life of me  , the one excuse  I can't get my head around  is "I haven't been a success." Success means so many things  and is different  for every person . It makes me sad  to think someone  would stay  away because of that .
Please tell those  who feel they cannot  attend reunions  because they aren't "successful": We miss you . Time  is precious  and we want to spend some of it with you .
Sad 50th HS Reunion
Dear Reunion ,
You have made  a heartfelt ples for people  to attend  such functions  regardless  of their personal insecurities . It is not uncommon for attendees  to judge  themselves  abgainst others' accomplishments  , but by the time a 50th reunion rolls around  , such fears  are meaningless . We know some people had  such terrible high school experience  that they have  no desire  to relive it in any form  , and they shouldn't  be pressured  . But for the rest of you please go .
Maxy