Last weekend ,my friends and I went to a party while visiting college . Since we are only juniors in high school, we have never been to this type of party and were nervous . Once we got there, we were confronted by a group of guys . I do not drink myself, so I felt uncomfortable when they asked to get us drinks . I was peer-pressured into having this mixed drink that was being served and I do not really remember the rest of the night . My friends told me the next morning that these guys had slipped something into my drink, which caused me to black out . I am very upset about this . My friends said they didn't allow the guys to take advantage, but still, I am upset with them . How do I address the fact that I am thankful, but still disappointed .
DistraughtFriend
Dear Distraught Friend ,
You have every reason to be upset . This is a very dangerous situation that could have turned out much worse . Rather than scolding your friends, you need to review your own personal checklist of things you will and will not do . Among them is the most difficult ... not succumbing to peer pressure . Call yourself the designated driver when you go to parties and choose not to drink, even if you aren't driving . Do not ever drink punch at a party . Do not have your friends or anyone else get a drink for you . Make it your policy to see the origin of the drink . That will help to reduce the chances of such folly in the future .
Maxy
Dear Maxy ,
I recently lost my job at a public relations firm, I have found another job, but it does not pay as much . I'm used to being able to splurge and buy the newest fashions, but my new salary does not afford me that luxury . I know they're just material objects but I miss being able to go to the store and buy whatever I want . How can I tailor my spending to my new salary while still be able to indulge myself once in a while ? Moreover, is indulging even financially responsible ?
Cutting Costs
Dear Cutting Costs,
Life's twists and turns require you to shift along with them . Your key question is what stands out . Is indulging responsible ? No . Sure, every now and then treating yourself to something special can be nice . But first, you should have a budget worked out that includes all your bills and a healthy allotment for saving short-term and for your retirement . You are never too young to put money away . That's way smarter than "throwing it away" on clothes or other things .
Maxy
Dear Maxy,
A young female member of my family has gotten fat and I asked her the reason for the change . Now she won't speak to me . Everyone says I made a mistake, because no one should ever ask a woman why she is obese . I care about this young woman and that is why I put the question to her . I don't want her to grow as big as another member of my family, that's all .
Concerned Old Man in West Hills
Dear Concerned ,
It is rude to ask anyone why they are fat . What exactly do you expect them to say ? You may have meant well, but your approach was insensitive . People who are obese are quite aware of the fact . I suggest you apologize and say you are simply worried about her . Then change the subject .
Maxy
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