Ask Maxy

Dear Maxy,

Should I tell my best friend that I caused her breakup more than five years ago ? One drunken night , I accidentally told her ex of her trifling , cheating ways . She always wondered why he broke up with her all of a sudden , but he swore he would never tell . And he didn't . Now they are dating again .

Every time I look at him , I think about what I did . The guilt is swirling around my head . I can't stop thinking about it .

Help me weigh the pros and cons of telling my friend of seven years this deep dark secret . Should I just bury this secret and act as if I didn't do anything ?

Feeling Guilty

Dear Feeling Guilty ,

I have a question for you : Why do you want to confess to your friend ? If the reason is that you feel guilty , I say get over it .

If you tell her about your indiscretion now , after she and her ex have found their their way back to each other , your disclosure will be about you . But this relationship is not about you . It's about your friend .

If her ex has come back to her after learning about her previous suspect behavior , let them be . What you can learn from this situation is to remember to stay out of people's business . If you stay in your lane , you will be able to sleep better at night .

Maxy

Dear Maxy , I feel like I'm addicted to the Internet . I do everything on the computer ... surf the Web , watch TV and movies , listen to music , even interact with my friends through Facebook , Skype and instant messaging . I don't want to become a couch potato , but the Internet is so important to my life and the lives of most of my friends that it is almost as if I don't have a choice but to use the computer a lot .

How can I limit my computer usage without falling behind socially ?

Plugged In

Dear Plugged In,

I have a revolutionary idea : Use the Internet to invite your friends to meet you in a place where you can physically be in one another's company . Make the activity appealing so that your friends will be intrigued enough to show up . Once the event is successful , it will be easier to get people to come out for another activity .

Essentially , you will be reminding people how rewarding shared face to face experiences can be .

Additionally , I recommand that you ration your time on the Internet . Decide that you will step away from the computer for social encounters , for rest , for chores and for your-time independant of it . I believe your social contacts will be curious about why you aren't as plugged ia as before and seek you out . You may win bigger than you can even imagine .

Maxy

Dear Maxy ,

I am a high school senior , and I plan to attend a four-year university in the fall . I am supposed to be designating my preferred housing option now , including whether I want a roommate . At my school , if one requests a single room , he or she will probably get it .

I am tempted to ask for a single because I would appreciate the space and privacy. However , nearly all freshmen live in doubles ot triples , and I am afraid I will be missing out on the quint-essential first-year experience if I don't have a roommate . Is it worth sacrificing the convenience of a single ?

Future Freshman

Dear Future Freshman ,

The good news is that you probably don't have to have a roommate all four years , since as a freshman you are being given the option of a single room . (Many colleges require freshman to have at least one roommate).

Since you are intrgued by the social experience of welcoming a roommate , I say , go for it . Be aware that you may have a broad range of experiences ... from fun and excitement to frustrating and boring . Savor them all . Then , when your sophomore year comes , you can decide if you want to share again or go solo .

Maxy